For some reason I opened my iweb blog today. Just to look around. I read those 12 or so entries and it was weird because I had a different voice. I think it was because I wasn’t blogging TO anyone. It was just to me. I wasn’t publishing it, I was just blogging. (I know, that doesn’t make sense, but we didn’t have internet, I wanted to blog, blah blah.) I guess when I blog now I write to you. I mean, there really are people out there actually reading this stuff! It makes me speak differently–like the difference between speaking one on one versus speaking to a crowd. I’m not saying one is better than the other, it’s just different. But I don’t think I’m as transparent. I know my family and friends read my blog, so I can’t say anything bad about them. I know I have some people from our old churches read and that makes me unable to say things that I’d love to say. And then, I have the whole I’m-a-Christian-be-a-light thing.
I actually did notice one big thing in those posts–I didn’t have to explain anything. If I mentioned Myrtis, well, I was the only one reading it and I didn’t have to tell where I met Myrtis or who she was married to. Now, if I mention something I feel obligated to write a fifteen minute background piece on it. Does that get boring? I hope not.
It’s funny how even in just a short amount of time my voice and what I thought my purpose for this blog has shifted. I like it though! I think my blog (and any blog) is dynamic. It goes with the ebb and flow of our lives. If I’m up, then my blog reflects it. If I’m busy, my blog reflects it. If it happens to be fall and all the new tv shows are out, well, it might just reflect that, too.
It’s like an empty journal that is waiting to be filled. I wonder where my blog will take me and what those archives will look like next month. Will I be a better writer? Or will there be something new I’m blogging about that hasn’t even crossed my mind yet?
It reminds me of a line from one of my favorite books as a kid. In the Betsy-Tacy series, Betsy writes a journal for every year of school. (I’m reading these to Lydia right now and they are just beautiful! I can even picture the illustration that is on the same page as this quote, she’s sitting by her trunk writing, complete in her turn-of-the-century clothes and hair. I love it!) Anyway in the sixth book she says, “‘Just a few lines to open the record of my sophomore year. Isn’t it mysterious to begin a journal like this? I can run my fingers through the fresh clean pages but I cannot guess what the writing on them will be. It’s almost as if I were ushered into the Winding Hall of Fate, but next day’s destiny were hidden behind a turning.'”
The Winding Hall of Fate. *shiver* Let’s see what the blog brings…