I get the feeling sometimes that I’m the “mean mom.” Do you know what I mean? The mom who doesn’t let her son do what his little friends are doing, or have what they have…
I’m already tired of being the “mean” one. But I realize I’m going to have a lot more of this feeling in my life as Elias gets to be more aware of what is out there and what he wants.
I really do not knock other parents for letting their children do what I don’t let mine do. I promise! My husband and I do have our priorities, though, and they seem to be different than many others. We have chosen for me to stay at home, and the financial ramifications of that are the most visible… My husband’s job is able to provide everything we need, but we still are living paycheck to paycheck. That means not having all the toys that Elias (already!) wants, going to all the classes his friends are going to, even eating lunch out with friends on a regular basis. We wind up staying at home a lot, playing with what we have and not even tempting ourselves (ehem… by this I mean me, too) by seeing what others have and are doing.
At this point in Elias’s life, this is most deeply felt with the toys he wants. He has TONS of toys – gifts, and yes, even the occasional splurge on my part – but there are toys that are out there that his little 3 year old heart desires, that I know are not beneficial for him, for his spirit, for his imagination, or our wallet. All those combined lead me to the conclusion that that toy (or class or whatever) is not a priority for us.
It is easy at this point in his life to distract him, but I am also working to instill in his heart a sense of gratitude for what we have and that God will provide all we need. And no, we don’t need that…
I had been struggling with how to say what I mean in this post – not to offend, but to present what is on my heart… and last week, these two posts really touched my heart. It looks like God is working in many peoples’ lives, calling them to Him and Him alone.
The priority that we are setting to “…be happy with what you have…”( 1 Timothy 6:6) is just one aspect of how our family’s priorities may be different from others. So now it’s your turn… how do you teach your little ones your family’s priorities, especially when they are different from others’?
I can SO relate! For me, it’s books. I want to buy my children lot’s and lot’s of books…and learning material for homeschooling. You know, I’m really learning how to just give it over to God. I remind myself that many who have gone before me have had much less…and their children still love the Lord and are filled with His knowledge.
Thank you for the link love! 🙂
It’s hard, Leigh. It’s the small things like “no Coke” to the big things like “we still don’t let Lydia watch Hannah Montana”. People roll their eyes and wonder why we’re so strict. But I think the thing is NOT restriction but “this is just the way we do it”…and somehow SOMEHOW it filters into our kids’ lives. And OUR priorities become THEIR priorities.
(Not sure if ANY of that made sense…)
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Oh, Leigh. I totally relate. We too have made the financial sacrifice for me to be at home. And that brings many sacrifices. So there is the financial side of teaching priorities. Then there is the spiritual side. My suggestion is tackle the spiritual angle and the rest will follow.
Maybe you can do a series of “studies” on Bible verses that teach about relying on the Lord, being content in the Lord, not being greedy, etc, just like Amanda has done with the Fruit of the Spirit.
.-= Heather @ Not a DIY Life´s last blog ..Bible Verse Craft – C =-.
I think our attitude toward it helps. If we have an attitude of apology toward our children for the things we’re “depriving” them of, they’re more likely to feel deprived. If we just matter-of-factly (is that a word? lol) communicate to them that “this is how our family does things,” they are more likely to not think of it is strange.
But there are always children who buck the system. I have a sister who at 25 still is annoyed at the “weird” way my family eats – even though the rest of us prefer it that way.
.-= Rachel R.´s last blog ..Super Food Recipe Roundup – Carnival of Super Foods =-.