source: Stuck in Customs
It’s been the week of deliberate disobedience.
The week of pushing limits and testing boundaries.
It’s also been the week of falling short at this whole motherhood gig.
My mouth has spewed barbed-wire too many times.
My eyes have revealed my inner thoughts.
My actions have shown my frustration.
And even when I feel like I’ve delivered, discipled and reined in my charges, my heart is laid low as they get up and jump on that same horse again.
I can’t rely on my if…then statements to comfort me: If I say this…she will respond the right way. They never work in real life. Platitudes and parenting books do not bring comfort when kids are wild and mothers are undone.
As I’m floundering to love, failing at leading and flopping at discipling, the comfort I need is a rock.
The Rock.
I love you, Lord;
you are my strength.
2 The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my savior;
my God is my rock, in whom I find protection.
He is my shield, the power that saves me,
and my place of safety.
3 I called on the Lord, who is worthy of praise,
and he saved me from my enemies.
4 The ropes of death entangled me;
floods of destruction swept over me.
5 The grave wrapped its ropes around me;
death laid a trap in my path.
6 But in my distress I cried out to the Lord;
yes, I prayed to my God for help.
He heard me from his sanctuary;
my cry to him reached his ears.
7 Then the earth quaked and trembled.
The foundations of the mountains shook;
they quaked because of his anger.
8 Smoke poured from his nostrils;
fierce flames leaped from his mouth.
Glowing coals blazed forth from him.
9 He opened the heavens and came down;
dark storm clouds were beneath his feet.
10 Mounted on a mighty angelic being, he flew,
soaring on the wings of the wind.
11 He shrouded himself in darkness,
veiling his approach with dark rain clouds.
12 Thick clouds shielded the brightness around him
and rained down hail and burning coals.
13 The Lord thundered from heaven;
the voice of the Most High resounded
amid the hail and burning coals.
14 He shot his arrows and scattered his enemies;
his lightning flashed, and they were greatly confused.
15 Then at your command, O Lord,
at the blast of your breath,
the bottom of the sea could be seen,
and the foundations of the earth were laid bare.
16 He reached down from heaven and rescued me;
he drew me out of deep waters.
17 He rescued me from my powerful enemies,
from those who hated me and were too strong for me.
18 They attacked me at a moment when I was in distress,
but the Lord supported me.
19 He led me to a place of safety;
he rescued me because he delights in me.
20 The Lord rewarded me for doing right;
he restored me because of my innocence.
21 For I have kept the ways of the Lord;
I have not turned from my God to follow evil.
22 I have followed all his regulations;
I have never abandoned his decrees.
23 I am blameless before God;
I have kept myself from sin.
24 The Lord rewarded me for doing right.
He has seen my innocence.
25 To the faithful you show yourself faithful;
to those with integrity you show integrity.
26 To the pure you show yourself pure,
but to the wicked you show yourself hostile.
27 You rescue the humble,
but you humiliate the proud.
28 You light a lamp for me.
The Lord, my God, lights up my darkness.
29 In your strength I can crush an army;
with my God I can scale any wall.
30 God’s way is perfect.
All the Lord’s promises prove true.
He is a shield for all who look to him for protection.
31 For who is God except the Lord?
Who but our God is a solid rock?
32 God arms me with strength,
and he makes my way perfect.
33 He makes me as surefooted as a deer,
enabling me to stand on mountain heights.
34 He trains my hands for battle;
he strengthens my arm to draw a bronze bow.
35 You have given me your shield of victory.
Your right hand supports me;
your help has made me great.
36 You have made a wide path for my feet
to keep them from slipping.
37 I chased my enemies and caught them;
I did not stop until they were conquered.
38 I struck them down so they could not get up;
they fell beneath my feet.
39 You have armed me with strength for the battle;
you have subdued my enemies under my feet.
40 You placed my foot on their necks.
I have destroyed all who hated me.
41 They called for help, but no one came to their rescue.
They even cried to the Lord, but he refused to answer.
42 I ground them as fine as dust in the wind.
I swept them into the gutter like dirt.
43 You gave me victory over my accusers.
You appointed me ruler over nations;
people I don’t even know now serve me.
44 As soon as they hear of me, they submit;
foreign nations cringe before me.
45 They all lose their courage
and come trembling from their strongholds.
46 The Lord lives! Praise to my Rock!
May the God of my salvation be exalted!
47 He is the God who pays back those who harm me;
he subdues the nations under me
48 and rescues me from my enemies.
You hold me safe beyond the reach of my enemies;
you save me from violent opponents.
49 For this, O Lord, I will praise you among the nations;
I will sing praises to your name.
50 You give great victories to your king;
you show unfailing love to your anointed,
to David and all his descendants forever.
{Psalm 18, NLT}
{go back and read that passage word for word if you just skipped over it. we’ll wait.}
My enemy is not an evil king. My enemy is not my children. My enemy is the sin which so easily entangles– the sin rushing to entangle, ensnare and destroy me and my family.
And it would.
Except.
My Rock.
This is the comfort I needed today.
linked to Lisa-Jo’s 5 Minute Friday where women stop, drop and write for 5 minutes.
What a beautiful passage to remember on the hard weeks. So glad we have the Rock that will not fail, that will not let us down. Thank you for your reminder!
“My mouth has spewed barbed-wire too many times.” can relate to this one. Thank you for sharing this Psalm.
Yes yes yes! The falling short, the tested limits- it has all been ours to claim here too. And that Psalm is amazing. That is the comfort we all need. Thank you!
Wait a minute. Have you been a fly on the wall at my home this week???? I’ve found myself desperately hungry for the Word and have been snatching bits and pieces for the last two days to regain perspective. Clearly I needed more. Thanks for blessing me with this passage!
Amen! The word of God is soooooo Goood! Thank you 4 sharing truth with us mama’s! God Bless you! :o)
Oh Amanda!
Thank you! Your words and Psalm 18 were my morning devo today. I had a week of being a short tempered spewing mom this week too. Opraise God we are forgiven and get to start fresh each morning. His Word is a lamp unto my feet. Camping with our boys this weekend was nit my idea of a mother’s day weekend. Now @ dawn I feel better. Rested. Renewed…and off to continue the adventure walk with my fellow early rising son!
That’s been my week, too. {sigh}
Think I need to go re-read that passage a few times.
I completely know how you feel. It’s been a rough week for me too. I haven’t been watching my tongue and have seen myself be completely disobedient to Him. Thank goodness for his forgiveness.
Xoxo