I’m a chronic apologizer (just ask my husband). I will (and probably have already) apologize for anything. But when it comes to my children, I’m slow to apologize to them (but very quick to demand an apology!). What makes them different from anyone else I would apologize to? In fact, they are more deserving of my apologies than probably anyone else. Who else in the world do I yell at at the drop of a hat and not suffer some immediate repercussions? So as I’ve had to un-learn apologizing to the world, I have had to learn to apologize to my sons. Here are 5 things that I need to apologize for to them:
- I’m sorry I yell at you.
- I’m sorry I get angry so easily.
- I’m sorry I meet childishness with childishness.
- I’m sorry for using sarcasm and meanness when I talk with you.
- I’m sorry for not paying attention to you when you need me to.
I’m not able to apologize to the boys for each of those specific things right now (sarcasm and childishness are hard to explain)- and I don’t apologize all the time. But when I do, here are 5 things that I immediately notice:
- My heart changes.
- My attitude changes.
- My boys’ behaviors changes.
- My house becomes peaceful.
- My children and I become closer.
For thus the Lord GOD, the Holy One of Israel, has said,”In repentance and rest you will be saved, in quietness and trust is your strength.” (Isaiah 30:15) – what a beautiful promise from the Lord! When I apologize out of a repentant heart, it heals hearts and builds our family together. We are saved from self, from anger, from bitterness… When I rest in quietness and trust, our home is a place of peace. We are strong together – in Him.
Why can’t I stay repentant and resting, in quietness and trust? With such great rewards, you would think I would strive to do this daily. This verse is definitely going up in our house – in some very prominent places!
How do you work to restore peace in your house? Do you apologize to your children?
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Dori says
All the things you listed are things I should apologize for as well. And maybe we wouldn’t need to apologize for sarcasm if we just stop using it, so that’s my new goal.
oh amanda says
Wow. Awesome, Leigh. I was just thinking about how I want to teach Lydia to apologize…and I rarely do it myself.
Thank you for that verse, too.
.-= oh amanda´s last blog ..Top Ten {Tuesday}: Healthy Snacks =-.
SaraR says
1. I’m glad I’m not the only one that needs to apologize for those 5 things.
2. I need to apologize for those things daily (sometime hourly) and I don’t.
3. I need to learn how to spell apologize.
Jennifer says
Love this. What a great reminder of our responsibility to teach our kids with actions as well as words that when we mess up, make it right.
Janna @ The Adventure of Motherhood says
Wonderful Post. I’m going to tweet it.
Children learn to love by the love we show them. Saying I’m sorry is such an act of love and restoration of a tear in the relationship.
Thanks for your transparency.
.-= Janna @ The Adventure of Motherhood´s last blog ..5 Easy Steps to Record YOUR Youth =-.
Kari says
GREAT post! I could’ve written it myself. I do apologize to my sons, often. I grew up with parents who rarely, if ever, apologized for anything. They thought it diminished their authority somehow. But I think one of the most respectful things a person can do is apologize when they’re wrong. So because I respect my children, and want the same in return, I always try to say I’m sorry when it’s due. It is very difficult sometimes, but SO important, IMO.
.-= Kari´s last blog ..Top Ten Tuesday: Things I Enjoyed Today =-.
Rachel Ramey says
I have to apologize to my children all. the. time. I like to think it will teach them that we all mess up, and that repenting and making it right is the really important thing. I suppose time will tell, on that count.
Heather - Dollar Store Crafts says
Thanks, I needed to read this today!! I feel like such a failure sometimes!
.-= Heather – Dollar Store Crafts´s last blog ..Recycle Canisters into an Adorable Mushroom Village =-.