A few months ago my husband picked up the audio book Every Man’s Battle by Fred Stoeker. It’s a book that deals with sexual purity for men–not just the physical act of sex, or wandering eyes or porn; but a pure mind and heart.
Mr. Stoeker believes the world has brainwashed us into thinking men just can’t help but give into sexual temptation. We falsely believe that’s just how they are and what they need. But he also believes men can find freedom from the sex-crazed world around us. And Mr. Stoeker ought to know, because he did give into sexual temptation and betray his wife and marriage. He’s allowed God to do a miracle in his life and this book is the result.
A few weeks ago I was contacted by Random House to do a book review for a book called The Healing Choice. It’s the personal story of two women who had been betrayed sexually by their husbands. As I was looking at the authors’ websites, I realized one of the authors, Brenda Stoeker is the wife of aforementioned Fred Stoeker! So, not only has God done a miracle in her husband’s life, but also in hers. She obviously felt betrayed and has allowed God to heal her broken heart. And now she’s sharing that experience with others. This is such a great picture of what God does–healing both parties and using that healing to help others! I love it!
(Oh, and of course, the other author, Susan Allen has a similar story. She and her husband have their own ministry called AVENUE which helps people impacted by sexual sin.)
I haven’t read the book yet, but here’s a little blurb about the book:
In the wake of betrayed intimacy, you may feel nauseated, angry, humiliated, desperate. Why am I not enough for him? Can our marriage be saved—and do I even want to try? Will this unbearable ache ever go away? Amid the devastation that follows a spouse’s sexual disloyalty, you need to know that you are not alone. God walks alongside you, offering comfort and a promise to transform the pain of the present into hope for the future. In addition, there is a community of women who know firsthand the agony caused by a husband’s sexual compromises and who offer the compassion, strength, and biblical wisdom you need to make healthy decisions for yourself and your family. The Healing Choice reveals the hope-filled stories of two such women, authors Brenda Stoeker and Susan Allen, who draw on their own experiences and those of many others to offer step-by-step advice for rediscovering intimacy with God and finding the support you need to move toward genuine spiritual and emotional restoration. Their down-to-earth insights light the path toward help and healing for every woman who longs to move beyond the pain of broken trust and experience God’s promise of hope.
I’ve got 2 copies of the book AND one Guidebook (which would be great for leading in a small group, I’m sure.) to give away. So, just leave me a comment on this post–just let me know if you’d like the book OR the book and the guidebook. I’ll pick 2 winners–one for just the book and one for the book/guidebook combo.
If you want the book but don’t want to publicize that you want it…well, just email me and I’ll enter your name confidentially, ok?
[fyi: There are lots of great resources on these author sites, too. I saw links to internet filters, forums and confidential ways to get help for men, women and teens. It reminded me of another site I heard about at church: x3church.com So, just in case you want some more info but don’t win the book or don’t want to buy it, check their sites out. I linked to them above.]
Valarie says
When my husband was youth pastor/school teacher in GA he used the book “Every Man’s Battle” in his disciplship groups. It’s a great book! And it’s so important for women to understand the battle, too. Thanks for sharing. I would love to have the book you’re giving away. I think that it would be a nice compliment to the other book.
Blessings ~ Val
The Diaper Diaries says
My dear friend is struggling through this right now and I would love to pass this onto her.
EMB opened my eyes to a whole lot of stuff I didn’t really want to know, but I am glad we are proactive about it rather than denying that the temptation exists.
misty says
this would be such an incredible tool. We are beginning a marriage group… My husband had an affair on me in 1999 which resulted in our divorce. Our reconciliation two years later was such an incredible God thing. Only by the grace of God, did we make it through actually. There were several books from the “every man’s battle” series which really helped us a lot.
We know that doing this group will really bring us into all kinds of unique marital situations, and what a wonderful addition to our resources, this would be…
Amy says
I would like the book only, thank you!
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