Answer me this… who in the world talks more than my 3 year old? I’m serious – Elias talks my ear off! Sometimes I get tired just listening to him…
With all the talking going on in our house, I’m needing to be more careful of my speech – and I’m trying to find ways to help Elias be aware of the importance of what he says.
Elias is already aware of the importance of words – he learned a long time ago that “No” means “No,” but “Not yet” means that he still has a chance… and if I’m not paying attention, he’ll try to get me to say “Not yet” instead of “No.” “Mommy, can I watch TV?” “No, buddy…” “Mommy, say ‘Not yet.’ Say ‘Not yet!'”
“Just let your ‘Yes’ mean ‘Yes.’ Let your ‘No’ mean ‘No.’ Anything more than this comes from the evil one. ” Matthew 5:37 (NIVR)
But how do I help him understand that his “Yes” has to mean “Yes?” It’s more to me than just annoying when he “changes his mind” about breakfast 3 or 4 times in a row. I want him to speak with intention – so people will trust his word, knowing that he means what he says. I know he’s probably young to worry about him being wishy-washy, but I feel in my heart that this is something we can work on now. Many probably dismiss children “changing their minds” over and over again as kids just being kids. But if we can impress upon our kids the importance of their words now, how amazing would that be? Their word would be a shining testimony for the Lord!
I know that the example my husband and I set will be foremost in Elias’s influence right now; we are also holding him accountable for the first thing he says. If he says he wants cereal first, then he gets cereal, even if he says he wants waffles later (there is grace involved, of course – but if the cereal is poured, he’s getting cereal!). That’s a small example – but hopefully, the small examples will stand out in his mind as he starts to speak about bigger things…
YOUR TURN: How do you help your kids speak with intention?
oh amanda says
Leigh, this is a hard one. I know what you mean just on the small level of the cereal. Lydia does this same type of thing–wanting a different stuffed animal to sleep with, or indecisive about a book, hairclippie. There are times I can tell she’s just undecisive and other times she’s making a deal out of it on purpose, you know?
I don’t really have great advice but the main thing is making sure MY no is no and yes is yes. Especially when it comes to discipline.
Hmmm…now I’m going to have to think about this some more…
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